Sweeney Todd - Pirelli's Miracle Elixir (2007) lyrics

Performed by:

Toby (Edward 'Ed' Sanders)

Sweeney Todd (Johnny Depp)

Mrs. Lovett (Helena Bonham Carter)

Toby: Ladies and gentlemen

May I have your attention per-lease?

Do you wake ev’ry morning in shame and despair

To discover your pillow is covered with hair

What ought not to be there

Well ladies and gentlemen

From now on you can waken at ease

You need never again have a worry or care

I will show you a miracle marvelous rare

Gentlemen, you are about to see

Something what rose from the dead--

On the top of my head!

T’was Pirelli’s Miracle Elixir

That’s what did the trick, sir

True, sir, true

Was it quick, sir?

Did it in a tick, sir!

Just like an elixir

Ought to do

How about a bottle, mister?

Only costs a penny, guaranteed

Does Pirelli’s stimulate the growth, sir?

You can have my oath, sir

’Tis unique

Rub a minute--

Stimulatin’ innit?

Soon you’ll have to thin it once a week!

Sweeney Todd: Pardon me, ma’am, what’s that awful stench?

Mrs. Lovett: Are we standing near an open trench?

Pardon me, sir, what’s that awful stench?

Sweeney Todd: Must be standing near an open trench

Toby: Buy Pirelli’s Miracle Elixir

Anything what’s slick, sir

Soon sprouts curls

Try Pirelli’s!

When they see the thick, sir

You can have your pick, sir

Of the girls!

Wanna buy a bottle, *missus*?

Sweeney Todd: What is this?

Mrs. Lovett: What is this?

Sweeney Todd: Smells like piss

Mrs. Lovett: Smells like-- phew!

Sweeney Todd: Looks like piss

Mrs. Lovett: Wouldn’t touch it if I was you, dear

Sweeney Todd: This is piss…

Piss with ink

Toby: Let Pirelli’s activate your roots, sir

Sweeney Todd: Keep it off your boots, sir--

eats right through

Toby: Yes, get Pirelli’s!

Use a bottle of it

Ladies seem to love it!

Mrs. Lovett: Flies do too!

Thanks to Ray for these lyrics

Thanks to Delspencerdeltorro for these lyrics

Thanks to Elizabeth for these lyrics