Nickelodeon

Nickelodeon - Better Than No One (Ren & Stimpy) lyrics

Ren: "Steempy! What's all that racket about?"

Stimpy: "I'm tap-dancing, Ren! Pretty good, huh?"

Ren: "Eet just sounds like noise to me! And you look even more stupeed than usual!"

Stimpy: "Oh, pshaw! Tap-dancing is fun, Ren! Why don't you join me?"

Ren: "Oh no, I'm no eediot."

Stimpy: "Oh c'mon! No one will ever see you."

Ren: "No way!"

Stimpy: "Just put these shoes on, and move your feet..."

Ren: "BACK OFF, MAN!! I can do it..."

Stimpy: "Now, don't you feel better?"

Ren: "Heeeey, thees eez fun! You're right, Stimpy. I'm sorry I'm all the time so mean to you."

Stimpy: "Think nothin' of it, buddy! Pal!

It's really great to have a chum

Who's kind and caring and lots of fun.

He slaps me around when I feel blue;

Only a pal would do that for you.

His name is Ren

And when it comes to a friend,

No one is better.

Your turn, pal!"

Ren: Ah, okay, bud--AAAAAAAAHHHHHHH!!!! You eediot! If you're going to tap-dance, do it on your own two feet!"

Stimpy: "Whoops."

Ren: "He's really fat, [Stimpy burps] but I admit,"

Stimpy: (What's that, Ren?)

Ren: "He's not so dumb..."

Stimpy: (Joy!)

Ren: "...For an eediot!

I hate the smell of his stinky leeter box

And when he fills me to my stay-put socks.

He's lost his mind

But when I'm een a bind,

He's better than no one.

Would you wanna comb my hair?"

Stimpy: "With glee!"

Ren: "Would you shave my tongue?"

Stimpy: "For free!"

Ren: "Would you flense my spleen?"

Stimpy: "Whoopee!"

Both: "You're the friend for me!"

Ren: "My friend to the end,"

Stimpy: (That's me! That's me!)

Ren: "Which I hope is soon,"

Stimpy: (He hopes is soon!)

Ren: "Has a head full of air"

Stimpy: (A head full of air?)

Ren: "Like a red balloon!"

Stimpy: "A balloon-head? Wow! What a great thing to be!

You always say the nicest things to me!"

Ren: "You're a fool!"

Stimpy: "But I think you're cool!

No one is better.

Would you tell me a story?"

Ren: "No way!"

Stimpy: "Would you pick my nose?"

Ren: "For pay..."

Stimpy: "Would you scratch my back?"

Ren: "No!"

Stimpy: "Pluck my brows?"

Ren: "No!!"

Stimpy: "Clean my box?"

Ren: [screams]

Stimpy: "Lick my fur?"

Ren: "All right, Stimpy! THAT'S EET! I've had enough of your stUUUUpid questions! The answer is NO! No, I tell you! A thousand times, NOOOO!!!!"

Stimpy: "Oh, just asking!"

Ren: "We're opposites by nature."

Stimpy: "He's a dog, and I-I'm a cat! I think."

Ren: "But put us both together..."

Stimpy: "And we're a purr-fect match!"

Ren: "Shut up!"

Stimpy: "Yes, sir! I'm glad he's here to tell me what to do!"

Ren: "Aw, somebody's got to think for you.

You may be a dud,

But when I need a bud,

You're better than no one."

Stimpy: "No one is better!"

Ren: "You're better than..."

Stimpy: "No one is..."

Ren: "Better than..."

Stimpy: "No one..."

Both: "No one... is better."

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