Monty Python - Every Sperm Is Sacred lyrics

Dad: There are Jews in the world, there are Buddhists.

There are Hindus and Mormons and then,

There are those that follow Mohammud, BUT

I've never been one of them.

I'm a Roman Catholic,

And have been since before I was born,

And the one thing they say about Catholics

Is they'll take you as soon as you're warm.

You don't have to be a six footer,

You don't have to have a great brain,

You don't have to have any clothes on,

You're a Catholic the moment Dad came.

Because...

Every sperm is sacred,

Every sperm is great,

If a sperm is wasted,

God gets quite irate.

Children: Every sperm is sacred,

Every sperm is great,

If a sperm is wasetd,

God gets quite irate.

Child: Let the heathen spill theirs

On the dusty ground,

God shall make them pay for

Each sperm that can't be found.

Children: Every sperm is wanted,

Every sperm is good,

Every sperm is needed,

In your neighborhood.

Mum: Hindu, Taoist, Mormon,

Spill theirs just anywhere,

But God loves those who treat their

Semen with more care.

Men: Every sperm is sacred,

Every sperm is great,

Women: If a sperm is wasted,

Children: God gets quite irate.

Priest: Every sperm is wanted,

Br. & Gr: Every sperm is good,

Nannies: Every sperm is needed,

Cardinal: In your neighborhood.

Children: Every sperm is useful,

Every sperm is fine,

Funeral: God needs everybody's,

Mourner1: Mine!

Mourner2: And mine!

Corpse: And mine!

Nun: Let the Pagan spill theirs,

O'er mountain, hill, and plain,

Statues: God shall strike them down for

Each sperm that's spilt in vain.

Everyone: Every sperm is wanted,

Every sperm is good,

Every sperm is needed,

In your neighborhood.

Every sperm is sacred,

Every sperm is great,

If a sperm is wasted,

God gets quite irate.