Lard - Mate Spawn And Die lyrics

Hair by mail

Tit jobs for teens

Go broke appearing rich

Searching for rosebud in the fire

Pop stars fingers in the fans

The therapist you wish you had

Crucifix or lubricant

Government by fad!

CHORUS

Mate! Spawn! and Die!

Mate! Spawn! and Die!

My my my my...

Are those salmon upstream turning red

From shear embarassment

Came all this way up all them ladders

Without checking a map

My the farce be with you

In one corner of the ring

That cherished myth

Falling in love magically solves

Every problem you've ever had

In the other corner

Spooon size shredded dreams

The Gods must be crazy

The movie goers must be crazy

CHORUS

Wrong worm, hooked again

Mounted on the wall in my own den

I'll talk alone to a firefly

Dial 1-900-Suk-Me-Dry

You can't throw me to the lions

I'm Charlton Heston!

You can't throw me to the lions

I'm Charlton Heston!

CHORUS

Yippe ti-yi-yi-yo

Ho ho ho ho

Whaat do you really want for Christmas, children?

"...Mmmmm...

Nice place ya got here, darlin'

Sure wish the hot water worked

Gotta rinse my jizz off before mornin'

Or I'll itch for a week-"

Rarp!

Damn! that water's cold

Agh!

Eeee!

Steven Tyler

Of all people once said

"If men bled

Would tampons be free?"

Omi'god, I gottag get goin'

"Now?"

I forgot to feed the cat