Chumbawamba - A Fairy Tale (Real No-Shit) lyrics

Chapt. Two - Guess who? Manfred The Great

The great king bashed down his goblet on the oaken table as kings do when they want more wine. Everyone was silent. 'Minstrel the noise of chattering women grates on my ears. Play me some music,' he bellowed.

A fairy tale handed down

I believed it, didn't we all

A man, a hero, walks on to the scene

Unquestionably good at everything

First he does battle with various creatures

Which compared to his goodness are evil monsters

Having made dragons extinct forever

He murders a couple of the castle guards

He enters the castle quite unnoticed

And tells the girl he'll be back for her

'And so I shall make her mine forever'

But runs into trouble and is taken prisoner

Is taken to the big bad, bad, bad, baddy

Baddy tells hero how goodness is finished

And has him strapped up to a slow-death device

But he escapes as the rope starts to burn through

The blade crashes down on the block where his head was

With a sword from the wall he finishes the castle guards

A lamp gets knocked over in the panic and a fire starts

A race against time to rescue the princess

To get past the baddy to get out of the castle

Out of the window where the horses are waiting

The couple ride off and the whole place goes up in flames