I guess I lied to you when I told you I like baseball
It's not so much the game I like it's the hats
See this white band around my neck? it's nice!
It's not just fashion
Hartz made it to protect me from ticks fleas and gnats

I couldn't care less what's in a chocolate mousse
I couldn't care less what are the five fruits in five alive juice
I couldn't care less how old are ernie and bert
I couldn't care less what's under kd lang's skirt

Shaggy said to velma, "hey now velma how you doing? "
And velma said "jinkies shag I'm just fine."
Then daphne said to fred "hey let's get drunk down in the forest"
And all night fred was yakking up red wine

I couldn't care less why was fonzie cool
I couldn't care less how sweat hogs do in school
I couldn't care less how do they fill the caramilk bar
I couldn't care less my car says "the door, is ajar."

I couldn't care less what's in a chocolate mousse
I couldn't care less what are the five fruits in five alive juice
I couldn't care less how old are ernie and bert
I couldn't care less what's under kd lang's skirt

I wish I had a nickname like crusher, snake or kenneth
Cause guys with nicknames always get the gals
When I grow up I'll name my children alice albert and alfred
I'll call them for supper like this, "dinner's ready, al!"

I couldn't care less what morton downey says
I couldn't care less what's on the head of my pez
I couldn't care less do zoodles need a trained zookeeper? 
I couldn't care less why's the super big gulp cheaper
No really, that's ridiculous

I couldn't care less what's in a chocolate mousse
It's ground up antlers
I couldn't care less what are the five fruits in five alive juice
Apples, cheese, broccoli
I couldn't care less how old are ernie and bert
Their like fourty or something
I couldn't care less what's under kd lang's skirt
I really don't know